Kindness in 2019
I have continued to reflect on Kindness. This underrated quality that I am seeking after in my life. I wrote last week on my aspiration in 2019 to practice Kindness (read here) more in my life, largely inspired by the way that I see my husband, ‘Greenie’, practising kindness in his life.
This morning I was listening to a podcast by Jen Hatmaker called “For the Love.” On it she featured a lady called Hillary McBride, who is a therapist and researcher. Having suffered for a decade from an eating disorder, she is now passionate about exposing the lies that we come to as a society around how we perceive our bodies. Her research on reasons why we are endlessly trying to achieve an unattainable standard of beauty are deeply fascinating and really challenged me.
Kindness for Everyone Except Me
In the Podcast she shares about a workshop she had recently done where she was interviewing woman about the way they negatively view their bodies. In the group so many of the woman were talking about the self-hatred they felt towards components of their body.
When asked if they subjected the same standard that they put on themselves towards others, each woman would answer with a resounding no.
Essentially these beautiful women, who had such high unattainable standards towards themselves, would never in a million years inflict this kind of judgement or standards on other woman. They would obsess over the muffin top over their jeans, or the curvature of their thighs, however it would not even enter their head to judge this with the same intensity to their friends or those around. It is this notion where we have grace for others but an innate inability to extend the same grace and kindness to ourselves. She exposed how so many of the woman would say essentially “I would never judge you the way I judge them.”
This resonated with me so much. I am my own harshest critic. Not only pertaining to my body but in the things of life. I would so love to start to practice kindness, starting with me in 2019.
Perhaps we can do it together.
I want to practice Kindness to myself for when I feel tired or sad, give myself permission to stop and feel and Know that my Father is close to the broken hearted and loves to comfort us in our grief.
I want to practice Kindness to myself when I am feeling exhausted, to stop and take a day or two.
I want to practice Kindness to myself and verbalise to my husband if I need him more. If the boundaries with church and family are blurred. Instead of telling myself to stop being selfish. For in doing so I am being kind to my marriage in the long run.
I want to practice kindness and think of something I want at the end of 2019 that is lavish and unnecessary, just because.
I am going to practice Kindness and release myself from a drive to provide for our family and know that God is our provider and I need not strive for with the motivation of financial resource but rather the Kingdom and let God in his Kindness be our Provider.
I will practice Kindness to myself in everything I do, I refuse to compare myself to others. For I am unique and nobody can do what I can do.
Beloved ones. I exhort you to practice Kindness to yourself in 2019
Here are some suggestions.
Practice Kindness to yourself by focusing on all the nutritious delicious fruits and vegetables and lean proteins you can consume rather than focusing on what you can’t.
Practice Kindness and do not force yourself to do anything that you do not enjoy or that you cannot maintain. Find something that you love to do. That you would do for Fun. Whether it is walking, dancing, running or surfing and make time to do it. For it is being Kind to yourself.
Practice Kindness and say no to all the things that you do out of obligation. Do what makes you come alive on the inside.
With Your Body
Practice Kindness to your body by giving your body permission to be whatever it decides to be and celebrate it. No one else cares about the muffin top over your jeans more than you. No one notices it. You are glorious.
With What You Wear
Practice Kindness and wear what makes you feel beautiful and comfortable at the same time. Who cares about what the latest trend is. You dance to the beat of your own drum. No need to conform to anyone around you. Find your own style and flaunt it!
Practice Kindness and find one thing that you can treat yourself to regularly and put it in the budget. I used to save ten dollars a week to get my lashes in medical school. You deserve it. Massage, hair, clothes? Save for it and treat yourself once a month. You deserve it.
Practice Kindness and set aside time even if it is five minutes a day to commune with the Father about how he sees you. Let him stoke your hair tell you how fabulous you are. Let him minister to your spirit and soul. He is so kind. If you let Him it will permeate through your entire being.
Beloveds in 2019 I want to Practice Kindness to myself.
Join me. I think it will change our lives. I think it will be the key to effortlessly being kind to others.
Don’t forget my e book is still available here “My life as a Preachers Wife.”
Until next time, you are deeply loved and richly cherished.
The Healthy Hiccup